


Apologetic Avoidance

by ChaoticNeurosis



Series: SPN One-Shots [9]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: ALL the tags, Avoidance, Dean Winchester/Reader One Shot, Dean is a father, F/M, Fluff, I hate tags, No Smut, Normal Life, One Shot, Sort Of, Tags, Unplanned Pregnancy, Unprotected Sex (Implied), emotional reader, implied sex, slight angst, uh, yep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:00:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24366946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChaoticNeurosis/pseuds/ChaoticNeurosis
Summary: Dean and y/n have one passionate night. Then he leaves without a word and doesn't answer any of her calls, texts, or attempts to contact him. He just...leaves.Then, when she finds out she's pregnant with his kid, she tries to call him again. Still, he doesn't answer. Dean is officially avoiding her.A year passes.When y/n drives into Kansas City for a conference with her new employer, she spots Dean in the crowd of suited up people. Why is he there? What purpose does he even have to be at a business conference?As the two are brought together again, they'll have to confront their issues head on. And Dean will be given a choice - will he take responsibility for his kid or will he just keep avoiding the situation altogether?(I hate summaries almost more than I hate tags).
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean Winchester/You
Series: SPN One-Shots [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1703326
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> This thing is actually a dream I had like three years ago. But it wasn't about Dean at all, so I just decided to change people and names and details and welp - here's my brain vomit!  
> I hope you enjoy this 3 part one-shot.

Making mistakes is human nature, but I am probably the queen of mistake making. An opportunity comes my way, and I manage to make a mess of everything before I can blink. Well, in this case, leaving the opportunity alone would have been the best decision for everyone, not just me. 

It was late. The bar was open. I was tired. Sam had already taken off as he and Dean weren’t on the best of terms. Those boys. They fight like an old married couple. So, with Sam back on the road by himself, Dean was left to his own devices till he decided to roll out. 

I sat at the bar with a beer bottle between my fingers. Condensation rolled down the glass as I read the label on the bottle, truly wondering if it was even worth what I had paid for it. Mistake number one for the night. 

Dean plopped beside me and ordered whatever I was drinking. 

“You’ll regret it,” I tried advising. “It tastes like piss.” 

The bartender brought over another bottle of the stuff, but Dean spoke up before the bottle had a chance to be opened. “On second thought, I’ll have a double. Scotch.” 

“Drinking heavy tonight, aren’t we?” I questioned as I sipped once more from the horrible beer. 

“Hey. Don’t judge my choices and I won’t judge yours.” 

“Fair enough. So, tell me Dean. What’s up between you and the jolly green giant lately? Y’all are moodier than usual.” 

Dean rolled his eyes as he downed the double scotch and immediately signaled for a refill. “Let’s just say we’re not on the same page about some stuff. What about you? Where’s your normal gang of happy hunters?”

I huffed a single laugh and tipped back the beer again. “Yeah. That went to pot a while back. Apparently stabbing first and asking questions later is not everyone’s philosophy.” 

“Too bad.” 

“It’s probably for the best, really. They were starting to get on my nerves anyway. It made me miss running the road with you two dingleberries.” 

“What made you leave in the first place?” Dean stared straight ahead as he asked the question. 

“Well, to sugarcoat it, I just felt like it was time for me to move on. You know me, Dean. I can’t stay in the same place for too long. I go stir crazy.”

“Yeah.” Dean cleared his throat and avoided looking me in the eye. “I wish you’d have stayed, y/n.” 

I stared at the worn hunter then. He clenched his jaw and his shoulders hunched as he rested his arms on the bartop. Something made him tense, and I perceived a flicker of something in his eye that I couldn’t put my finger on. 

“Why?” I asked. 

Dean simply tipped back the drink in front of him and gestured for it to be filled again. 

“Dean?” I pushed further as he still sat silent and unmoving. “Tell me.” 

My heart began to pound in my chest, uncertainty taking over as I waited for an answer. Either he would say what I wanted to hear or something as generic as I was a good friend to him and Sam and good hunters are hard to come by. I silently pleaded that he would say what I wanted to hear from those pouty lips. 

“Uh. Ya know. We miss you. You’re uh...a good friend.” 

I internally sighed. Of course. Nothing but a good friend. “Right,” I said, shoving down the disappointment. 

“And,” he continued. 

I raised my eyes to look at him once more. 

He quickly flicked his tongue over his lips and turned to look at me. “I really miss you.” 

“Oh?” 

“Yeah.” He didn’t seem to feel the need to divulge more information. He left it at that. 

“Well. Alright then.” 

“Look, what I’m trying to say is…” Dean hesitated, and he swallowed down emotions he either didn’t want to admit or he didn’t want to feel in the first place. “I need you.” 

“Y-you what?” I felt the wind knocked out of me with three simple words. A stray butterfly fluttered through my stomach and I wanted to replay the moment, to see if I’d actually heard him correctly. 

“You were one of the only things holding us together, y/n, and with you gone? It’s just not the same. With everything that’s going on with me and Sam - or what’s _not_ going on - I need an ally. You always seemed to be the glue that held us all together. Could you come back with me? Come back to us?” 

His words hit me square in the chest as they sank in, absorbed, became part of my being. It wasn’t exactly what I had in mind, but it was close enough that I was half a second away from dropping all my obligations to get in the Impala and run away with him. 

“Dean, I-”

“I understand if you don’t want to. I don’t want to tie you down.” 

I grabbed for one of his large, calloused hands and gripped it tight. He flicked his gaze between my fingers curled around his and my eyes, confusion mixed with hope. 

“Dean…” But I couldn’t make myself finish the thought spinning around in my mind. _I’ll come back with you. And I’ll never leave you again. Because I love you. And it’s why I left. I couldn’t bear the proximity - how many times I wanted to wrap myself around you and never let go. It was less painful to leave than it would have been to stay._

Dean’s gaze became intense, serious, and almost overwhelming. He brought a hand to my face and cupped my cheek. Before I knew what was happening, he was leaning in, his green eyes fluttering closed as he gingerly met my lips. Pure shock raced through me, so I didn’t even return the kiss. I just sat there in complete surprise, my eyes wide at what he was doing. 

When he sat back, all I did was stare at him. 

“Uh…” His hand left my face, and I almost whined from the loss of contact. “I’m uh...I’m sorry. I thought…” Dean sighed, defeat written on his face, and he gestured for another double to hit the bartop in front of him. “Never mind. Just forget that happened.” 

“Dean.” 

“I’m sorry, y/n. That was out of line.” 

I placed a hand beneath his chin and turned his head to look at me again. “Dean.” A feeling of hope mixed with the small amount of depression I felt. Whatever that emotion is called, it shot through every cell of my body, and all I wanted in that moment was for him to kiss me again, and this time I would respond. 

Dean’s eyes were still intense, and I hoped my expression let him know what I wanted. What I felt. That he had done the right thing - I was just monumentally surprised. 

A question filled his face and he leaned in again, almost hesitant. I met him in the middle, and our lips once again pressed together. They were soft despite the slight chap across them. They whispered against mine, almost uncertain if this truly was the right thing to do. But when I increased pressure, increased responsiveness, I felt Dean let down his guard, and soon his hands found their way to the back of my head, to my waist. 

“Dean,” I whispered as I broke away from him. “Maybe we should…” 

Mistake number two for the night.

It had quickly become more heated than intended, and I didn’t want the barflies in the joint to stare in disgust as two strangers sucked face. 

Dean cleared his throat before downing the double in front of him. He slammed money down on the counter and gripped my hand to drag me away with him.

How we got back to the hotel I’ll never know. But soon we hurriedly removed clothes, frantically searched for more and more contact, needed to be wrapped around each other. Somewhere between everything, Dean had said something to me I knew he regretted. 

“Y/n,” he murmured as he came up for air from the breathless kisses. “Y/n, I love you.” 

I stared, filled with shock again, as he waited for a response. With arms around his shoulders and bare bodies pressed together, I whispered a reply. “I love you too, Dean.” 

Mistake number three for the night. 

When passions quieted and the writhing only associated with sex had stopped, Dean allowed me to nuzzle into his side as he held me tight against him. I let the sound of his heartbeat be my lullaby, and I soon slept beside the man I should have never confessed my feelings for. 

The next morning, he was gone. 

Just. Gone. 

He didn’t leave a note. He didn’t text me. He had vanished. 

I went through the motions of the day, hurt and heartbroken. It felt as if Dean Winchester had used me like any other bar bimbo he’d pick up. 

However, it seemed we made another mistake that night that neither of us considered at the time. It was one month later when I found out I was pregnant with his child, and when I called to let him know, he didn’t respond. He didn’t call me back. Not even a text message was sent. It seemed he didn’t care or wanted anything to do with me or the kid I was carrying. 

I truly debated whether going through with the pregnancy was a good idea, but the thought of terminating a life when my line of work was to save people didn’t sit right. So I kept the baby. 

Even when I had called Dean to let him know I was keeping it, he never called back. 

Dean Winchester was avoiding me. And it hurt more than any injury I had received from the hands of monsters.


	2. Part 2

**ONE YEAR** **LATER**

Hadley. I don’t know why I chose that name for her, but it was a good thing the child was a girl because I could never find a boy name I liked. She had arrived almost two weeks early, but I wasn’t complaining. Discomfort was high as the third trimester crept on and on. 

When Hadley was born, I made another effort to call Dean, just to let him know he had a daughter and she was healthy. He didn’t answer me when I called, and he never responded after the voicemail. I was on my own. 

My daughter reminded me of Dean, though. Her eyes were definitely going to be his shade of green. There was no doubt about it. She had his nose too. The kid was a beautiful baby, although I may have been biased. Paired with my y/h/c hair, she was bound to be a heartbreaker when she got older. Especially if she inherited any of the Winchester charm. 

It was a struggle to find a way to get out of hunting and establish myself within a normal job, especially being pregnant with hardly any work experience outside of hunting. But I was able to land a good-paying job as a secretary for one of the higher ups in a rocketing corporation in St. Louis. It helped to have friends that would lie for me. 

My boss was headed to a conference, and she wanted me to accompany her. It was a chance to learn more about upcoming decisions and where things were potentially headed for the company. A trusted coworker agreed to watch Hadley for the few days I was scheduled to be gone, and I tearfully left my baby behind as my boss and I traveled to Kansas City. 

We entered the center the day after arriving in the city for the conference, and as I looked around, it was a flood of business suits and dresses wandering the foyer outside the auditorium. Business executives, CEO’s, and underdogs mingled together, and I felt intimidated. This wasn’t my world, but I knew I’d have to adopt it sooner or later if I wanted a good life for Hadley. 

“Y/n? You in there?” my boss asked, waving her hand in front of my dazed eyes. 

“Huh? Oh yeah. Sorry, Nicole. Just...a little overwhelmed.” 

She flashed me a reassuring smile and patted my arm. “You’ll get used to it. We have about ten minutes before everything starts. I’m going to head to the restroom then we can find our seats.” 

“Alright,” I said, nodding acknowledgement. “I’ll just wait here.” 

I continued to stare at the sea of bodies, pushing and pulling against each other, a mass of likeminds and potential competition. How many of them are sleeping together, I wondered. How many kissed ass to the top? I knew it was cutthroat in this world, but it was just something I would have to get used to. And I had to make others understand I had no intention of going to bed with anyone just to get a promotion. It wasn’t worth it. 

As my mind continued to swirl in its own train of thought, I glimpsed someone out of the corner of my eye and my breath caught in my throat as I did a double take. 

No. 

Yes. There, standing in the corner of the foyer, was the unmistakable form of a man I knew very, very well. Just over six feet tall, honey blond hair, striking green eyes, and the most recognizable smile I’d ever known. 

Dean Winchester. 

I quickly looked away and hurried to a hidden corner to wait for Nicole to come back so we could go into the auditorium.

I wouldn't say it was traumatizing to see him again - just unexpected and horrifying. I was both livid and somber. It would have been different if there had been any effort on his part. I had never asked for child support. All I had ever asked was for him to acknowledge that he had a kid and he should meet her, spend time with her, form a bond that lacked between him and his father. Dean would be a good father, or at least that's what I thought at one point. But now? Every doubt swam through my mind.

The attempt to avoid Hadley’s father for the next few days commenced. 

When Nicole found me, an amused confusion danced in her eyes. “Y/n? Are you okay?”

“Yep. All good. Let’s go find our seats.” 

Nicole glanced at her watch and nodded. “Yeah. The first presentation starts in about five minutes. I’d like to get sat down before the horde arrives.”

“After you,” I said, gesturing for her to go first. 

As we slipped through the auditorium doors, I kept my head down and back turned toward Dean as best I could. I realized I was breathing quickly and my hands were shaky. He had an effect on me he should not have had. But what the hell was he doing here?! 

“Are you sure you’re alright, y/n? Do you need to take a break from all this?” Nicole had always been a considerate and kind boss. 

I shook my head and smiled at her, hoping to dispel any uncertainty she had. “No, I’m fine. I promise.”

“Alright.” 

We spoke very little as we waited for the conference to begin, but once it did, I was sucked into the world I was still fairly new to. It did fascinate me on some level, but it was nothing like the rush of hunting down a werewolf in the dead of night during a full moon. Or tracking down the lair of a Djinn. Or rushing into a demon fight knowing your life hung in the balance just by being in the same room with the hellish creatures. My life had taken a substantial downswing, but I had to do what was best for my daughter. And getting out of the life was the only thing I could do to keep her safe.

The only problem was she was the daughter of a Winchester, and if anyone found that out, Hadley was automatically put in harm’s way. 

Break time quickly came and I almost ran to the restroom. If Dean saw me, I didn't know what I would say or do. As I exited the restroom from freshening up, I saw him again only a few feet away. He was difficult to miss at this distance. He looked up from his conversation and saw me. His eyes widened and he stopped talking seemingly in the middle of a sentence. Panic entered his gaze and it slowly morphed to something that wasn't quite anger, but it was certainly frustration. He seemed to excuse himself from the conversation and walked toward me. 

"Y/n," he spoke, his voice almost an octave lower than was normal. Something in me relaxed and wanted to run away at the same time. "What are you doing here?"

"I’m here with my boss for the conference. It’s part of my job now.” I crossed my arms as I stared at him, daring him to speak ill about what I’d chosen to do. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"None of your damn business, that's what." Dean was defensive. His eyes held nothing but pure guarding. He didn't want me to see into him at all. For all I knew, he had been completely devastated this past year and I'd never known it by his stoic expression. "Don't you have a baby to look after?" Dean’s tone was cold. 

My jaw almost dropped at his inconsiderate question. Anger coursed through me at the question. So he _did_ know. Just another man that didn’t want to take responsibility for his actions. "Like you would know,” I spat back. “You have not supported me or your child. I tried to contact you."

"I know. I thought the avoidance would send a message." 

I shook my head. "You had no right to just leave me like that. Especially when I found out I was pregnant." 

"That is not my fault."

"It’s just as much _your_ fault as it is mine! There were two people that night, Dean! Not just me!” I tried to keep my voice quiet, but it was becoming more difficult. I almost didn’t recognize this man in front of me. He was not acting like the Dean Winchester I once knew. “I just wanted an explanation as to why you wanted to leave me alone with a baby. Why did you just run out on me?!"

He looked around nervously. "Somehow I knew this would happen." Sighing, he left me standing in anger and with no answers. 

I watched him walk away. I shook my head in frustration and walked back into the auditorium to take my seat. This conference couldn't end soon enough. 

**Two days later**

I finished packing my bags to leave for St. Louis and to get back to my daughter. Seeing her father again had not been the meeting I anticipated. He was rigid and not the man I had known before this all happened. I wondered what pain he endured to turn him into a sour shell of the Dean I once knew. 

My emotions were all over the place. Sure, a year ago, I had loved him with abandon - wanted him and only him. But now? Seeing how Dean was responding to the entire situation had flipped a switch and I wanted nothing to do with him. If this was how he wanted to treat me and his daughter, then it was best if he just stayed away from both of us. He had no rights to her after this. 

_Knock, knock, knock_.

I walked to the door and opened it, expecting Nicole to be on the other side. 

"Dean?" He stood there with a blank stare. "What the hell are you doing here?" 

"I don't intend to reenter your life, y/n. I want you to know that." As if he needed to make that any more clear.

"I never expected you to. That would be too much to ask from a man who just walks out on someone." 

He didn't respond in any obvious manner. "What do you want?"

"I want you to meet your daughter," I practically yelled.

He paused and stared at me. I could see an internal argument happening in those still-beautiful green eyes. His expression momentarily softened as he came to a conclusion. "Yes, I can do that." 

"That's all I ask." 

"Good." 

The anger and bitterness between us remained. Without another word, he turned and left. Then, without facing me, he asked, "What's your address?" 

I gave him the location of my apartment. 

"I'll be there. Some day." Dean continued to walk away and around the corner to the elevator. 

I closed the door and roughly zipped the last bag closed. Damn him, I thought. Damn him and all his stupid pride. 

As Nicole and I hit the highway, I tried to push out any thoughts of Dean. He would not ruin the mood of the road trip. It was time to go home to my baby.


	3. Part 3

**One Month Later**

As the weeks after the conference went by, I had forced myself to all but forget the non-confrontation with Dean. He still avoided the topic as to why he decided to practically abandon me after one steamy night. And why he thought leaving me alone with a baby was a good idea. But one look at the little girl that came from all that drama eased any frustrations. Hadley was my entire world, and I would prove myself as a good mother to her. Single moms killed motherhood every day. I could do this. 

It was a Saturday morning. The sunlight streamed into my St. Louis apartment, and I sat on the small balcony overlooking the busy city streets. Steam danced away from my coffee cup and I sighed in contentment. Mornings like this had been practically nonexistent when I was still hunting. Life had become somewhat normal, and I was reveling in it. If trouble decided to walk through my front door, then I would have to pack up and move, but at the moment? This was pure bliss.

I continued to enjoy the spring sunshine as a soft, almost hesitant knock sounded on my door. Confused at who could possibly be visiting me, I set my mug down on the table on the small balcony and walked back inside to the door. As I looked through the small hole that allowed me to see into the hallway, I almost fell down. 

So. He had come after all. 

I unlocked the door and opened it, and I just stared up at the man in front of me. His hands were shoved into his jeans pockets and his face was completely unreadable. He had a new cut on his lower lip, so I knew he had gotten into a skirmish recently. With what was the million dollar question. It could have been almost anything. 

"Dean," I said, still cold to him. 

"Y/n. Can I come in or are we just going to have a Mexican standoff?"

I stepped aside and opened the door wider for him. "Yeah. Come in." 

He walked into my apartment without a 'thank you' or even a 'thanks'. I rolled my eyes and closed the door to walk to the kitchen. 

"Would you like some coffee?" I asked as I tried to remain calm and hospitable for the both of us. 

"Uh sure. Thanks." 

Finally a word of gratitude. I grabbed a mug and filled it, sliding it over to Dean who stood on the other end of the small kitchen island. He wrapped his hands around the coffee cup and stared at the counter. 

"I honestly wasn't expecting you to show up at all," I said. 

Dean momentarily flicked his eyes up to look at me, then gazed back at the counter. "I wasn't either. But...Sammy kinda forced me." 

I scoffed in amusement. "How the hell did he manage that? You don't do anything you don't want to." 

"He called me an ass. And an absent father. And that I was treating this like Dad would. Kinda woke me up." 

The room was silent for a few beats before I asked the only question I ever wanted an answer to. "So why'd you leave me like that?" 

Dean took a sip from the steaming liquid in the mug and cleared his throat as he pulled over one of the stools at the island. "I uh. Well, it doesn't make things any better." 

"Any answer would be better than nothing, Dean." 

He kept staring at the coffee cup between his hands, completely silent, but I let him sit there. It seemed he was trying to gather his thoughts into something comprehensible, which I understood. I often had to do the same thing when forced with a difficult situation. 

"I thought I'd made a mistake telling you how I - how I felt. About you. Thought maybe it was the alcohol talking when you..."

"What, when I said it back?" I cocked my head to the side slightly, brows pinched in puzzlement. Did he really think I had admitted that to him from alcohol? I barely had half a beer. It wasn't alcohol's fault. It was hormones. 

"Yeah." 

"Dean." An amused laugh accompanied his name. "You do realize I was completely sober, right?" 

"I did a few days later. Realized _I_ was the one with more alcohol in my system." 

"Dean..." I sighed and shook my head. "Do you know how much relief I felt to hear those words from you?" 

"Relief?" He stared at me as if he needed further explanation. 

"Yes, relief. I had been carrying a torch for you for...I don't know how long. So after I woke to you just being AWOL, no note, nothing, I felt like some whore you'd pick up in a bar. Like you just needed one night with someone to make yourself feel better about whatever was bothering you." 

"That wasn't what I wanted. I never intended to just leave you behind like that."

"So why did you?"

Dean sighed as he tried to gather his thoughts again. "You were the one person I - The one woman that I could..." He took another drink from his coffee. "Look, you were the one woman that got me. You understood my life, what I'd been through. You were always there when I needed a pep talk or when I needed something to take my mind off whatever new impending doom was out there. And I thought I had messed that up after that night. So I ran." 

I stared, dumbfounded, at Dean. And I had to laugh. A deep belly laugh I hadn't had in a long time. 

"What? Why are you laughing?" He seemed hurt that I was laughing at the heartfelt words he had just spilled. 

"I'm sorry. It's not at you, Dean..." I tried to get a handle on the laughter and explain myself. "It's just...You could never mess that up by one night like that. Ever. You messed it up by not talking to me. I would think the calls, texts, and voicemails I left would have hinted you in that you didn't mess it up." 

"I was mad at myself, y/n. From giving in to what I'd wanted to do for a long time." 

"It was all consentual, Dean." I paused before continuing. "And now I have something that is a reminder of that night." 

Dean took a deep breath and his eyes fell once more to the counter top, and I knew that look. That was guilt. Unadulterated shame. "About that..."

"I'm not sorry that she's here, Dean. I'm sorry that you never once tried to meet her or support her. I'm going to ask again. Why?" 

He didn't respond for a long time. His fingers messed with the coffee cup and he clenched his jaw, tension filling his shoulders. "I was terrified." 

"Of responsibility?" 

"Of bringing my life to her!" he retorted as he quickly snapped his eyes back to mine. He was loud enough I hoped he didn't wake Hadley. "We both know that...if anyone got word that I have a kid out in the world, it would be used against me. She could die, y/n." 

"Why do you think I got the job I have? I couldn't raise her like that. I would never want to." A few beats of silence echoed around the kitchen. "That's why you didn't even acknowledge her? Fear for her life?" 

He nodded slowly and swallowed down another emotion. "Yes. I'm-I'm sorry. You should know that. I'm sorry. I should have at least called you back." 

"Yes, you should have. But that doesn't change anything now. What matters is that you're here and you're willing to at least meet her." 

"Where is she anyway?"

I gestured the direction of the nursery. "She's still asleep, thank goodness. It was a fight to get her down last night. I never thought she'd go to sleep." 

"Maybe she sensed me." 

"I'm sure that wasn't the reason, Dean. Sometimes she's just fussy." 

He took another sip of the coffee and looked between me and something in the background. It had been hard for him to keep eye contact from the moment he arrived. 

"Wha-what's her name?" 

I had to smile at the question. It was one answer I was sort of excited to say. "Hadley Paige...Winchester." 

Dean's eyes widened in shock as I revealed her last name. An almost-smile twitched at the corners of his mouth as the information washed through him. "You gave her my name? Not yours?"

"Well, it was no mystery who her father is. What was the point of giving her my name? She's your daughter, Dean. She even looks like you." 

Dean scratched the back of his neck as he still contemplated the news. He sighed and stared at the kitchen island, more remorse flashing through his expression. "Can I be honest with you?" he asked. 

"Always, Dean."

"I ran because I was scared. I didn't intend for what happened that night to even take place. When you called to tell me you were pregnant, I panicked. I wasn't ready to be a father." 

I simply stared at him, a sense of disbelief most likely apparent in my face. "You think I was ready to be a mom?" 

"I know. I'm sorry. Again. I'm so sorry." 

That's when Hadley began to cry, the alarm that she was ready to be changed and eat. "And that's my cue." I set my own coffee cup down on the counter and walked down the hall. "I'll be right back," I called back to Dean. 

I walked into Hadley's nursery and turned on the light. I couldn't help the smile at seeing my very discontent daughter in her crib. "Good morning, sweetheart." She continued to wail. "I know. Come here, darling." 

After a quick diaper change, I walked with her cradled in my arms to make up her bottle to mute her cries. After the bottle was made and she began to eat, I looked up at Dean. His hands gripped the counter as he stared with wide eyes at the bundle in my arms. 

"What?" I asked, amused. 

"She's...she's so small." 

"Well, she is only three months old. Well, just about." 

"I made that?" His question just made me laugh. 

"Well with help. But yes, Dean. This is your daughter." I walked around to his side of the island and I saw him step back. "Dean. She won't bite. Not yet, anyway. Come here." 

He hesitantly took a step forward, but he was still an arm's length away. With a sigh, I closed the small distance. Dean stared at the little girl almost in disbelief, mixed with amazement. A flicker of bewilderment flashed in his green eyes, and I couldn't help but grin at the usually stoic hunter. All of his guards had completely fallen once he set eyes on Hadley. I could honestly say this was a side of Dean I had never seen before. The softest I had ever seen. 

"Do you want to hold her?" I asked as she finished her bottle. 

Panic. "Uh. I uh...Don't you think I'll break her?" 

I chuckled and shook my head. "No, Dean. You won't break her. Come on." 

I gently laid Hadley in Dean's arms, and he treated the little girl like she was made of glass. His eyes became a little teary at holding his daughter. He walked with her to a chair in the living room and sat down, his arms protectively cradling her. And in that moment, I knew if anything or anyone tried hurting Hadley, Dean would become a monster of a man and tear the threat to complete shreds. 

"Hi," Dean murmured to the baby girl. "You don't know me, but I'm your...I'm your dad." The last words were choked with tears. "And I promise, I will never leave you behind again. I'm gonna be here. Maybe not all the time, but you can count on me to be here for all the important stuff. I don't want to miss anything. And I'll try to be the best damn dad I can be. I'm gonna mess up, because I'm kinda new at this. But I'll try." 

There he was. There was the Dean Winchester I knew. Protective yet kind. Gentle with caution. Deep certainty about his purpose. This was the Dean I had fallen in love with. 

Something came over me, and I walked over to where he sat with Hadley and I took the place beside him. I reached up and cupped his cheek and gently pressed a kiss to his lips. He didn't resist and he eagerly returned it. 

"Uh...Maybe I shouldn't have..."

"No," Dean said, cutting me off. "That was perfectly fine. Don't apologize." 

"Thank you. For coming here."

Dean looked back down at the baby in his arms and grinned wider than I'd ever seen. "I'm glad I did." 

As he sat there holding his daughter, I knew the two would be inseparable and she would turn out to be exactly like him. Although, I hoped and prayed that didn't involve hunting. If it happened, then it happened, but as long as I had a say and as long as I stayed out of the life, Hadley Winchester would have a stable home with two parents that adored her. Without a monster in sight. 

And I hoped Dean would find a way to get out of everything, to leave it all behind once and for all. I hoped he could find a way. It may have been hope in vain, but Hadley needed her father. And I knew Dean wanted to be there for her. 

"I love you, Dean," I whispered. 

He took his eyes away from his baby girl and stared back at me with more intensity than I'd ever seen. "I love you too, y/n." 

And in that moment, we were a perfect little family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! :)  
> If you liked it, please let me know.


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